The celebration of Festivus begins with the Airing of Greivances
"I got a lot of problems with you people! And now you're going to hear about it!"
I am pretty blessed that I only have a couple of sticking points in my life, all revolving around my job. Actually I don't mind my job, if it were in any other place or time it might be fine. But the company that I work for is Evil, in a Biblical way. They should rename it Con-Glom-O ("We Own You".) Those of you familiar with Rocko's Modern Life might remember that. Maybe if I were more cut out for the corporate lifestyle I might not mind it, but everything about it is out to destroy my soul. Seriously people, they time everything you do. There is this dodgy little database (named the Electronic Daily Log) that you're expected to punch in, punch out, punch in, punch out every single different task you do all day long. You go to the bathroom, you punch when you leave and punch when you get back all in the name of timing how long it took you. And it's not like it's handy on your desktop, oh no! That would be too easy. You have to go in and pull the entire thing up fresh every single time you make a punch (even if was just 4 minutes since your last punch), locate your name and the current date (out of approx. 25-30 other people's names with about a week's worth of entries for each person--you do the math) find your record and update your punch, and then get back out of it. Because they can't create a database that actually WORKS. If more than one person is in it for too long the entire thing will crash. If you forget (God forbid) to complete a punch, you must email an email box, explain what happend and provide the missing information, which then goes on your record as having inconvenienced the very-picky administrator with a manual update. Oh and I could keep going!!! There's more. But I will stop because I know most of you are nauseous at this point. Just know that this kind of administrative garbage is what your healthcare dollar is paying for, to create complicated and demeaning hoops for the disgruntled employees to jump through.
The Feats of Strength
Festivus is not over until the head of household is pinned to the ground. (you'll have to click on this picture to see the whole thing).